Ijunoon

Wife- i will die.
Husband- i will also die.
Wife- Why do you want 2 die?
Husband- bcoz main itni khushi bardasht nahi kar sakta!

There were 4 friends: somebody,nobody,brain & mad
One day Somebody & nobody were fighting while
Brain was in washroom. And mad called to police.

Teacher: Bachon wada kro kabhi sharab,
cigrette nahi piyo ge
Bachey: Nahi piyenge
Teacher: Girls ka peecha nahi karoge
Bachey: Nahi karenge
Teacher: Unn par awaaze nai kaso ge
Bachey: nahi kasenge
Teacher: Watan par zindigi qurbaan karo ge
Bachey: Kardenge, Aesi zindigi ka karna bhi kya hai..

aik adimi ne apni wife ko khat likha...

""iss mahene salary k badley 100 kiss bhej raha hoon""
wife ne jawab diya ""app ki salray k badley 100 kiss miley,
hisaab bhej rahi hoon.
1.doodh wala 2 kiss mea maan giya
2.teacher ko 7 kiss deni paree,
3.sabzi wala 7 kiss mea nahi maana isliye 9 deni pari.
4.makaan malik to rooz 6-7 kiss le jata hay.
app fiker nahi kerna,
mere pass abhi lag bhag 30,40 kiss or hain.
MAHINA ARAM SE KAT JAEY GA...

A child had never seen his hips, once his teacher beat with ruler on his hips... he was very angry he came back to home and saw his hips in the mirror n said:
(KAMEENE NE DO TUKREY KAR DIYE)

Child: Mom iss bar saray patakhay hum is shop say lain gay,
Mom: Beta yeh tu girls hostel hai,
Child: Papa tu kahtay hain k sari phuljhariyan yahin rahti hain.

Devdas says to Paro: aik sham mera naam ker do.
Paro : ja ja main kahan or tu kahan.
Devdas:itna garoor tu CHAAND ko bhi nahin hai.
Paro:kase hota CHAAND per dagh jo hain.
Devdas called his son(CHAAND):Tu aaj phir nahaya nahi... .

EK UNPARHAY(ILLETERATE) CONDUCTOR SE:
GAARI MAI JAGAH HAI.
CONDUCTOR: HA EK ADMEE KEE.
SAWAREE: LEKEN MERE PASS DOU LADIES BHI HAIn.
CONDUCTOR: TUM BAITHO MAI LADIES KO OPPER BAANDh LUNGA.

Boy to girl
""Yaar aaj kaal shahr say texiya khatam ho gayee hain""
She reply
""kiya karen Rakshay jo chalna shuru ho gaye hain""